Dally's Journal

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Entry 1
Dallas Skye

When I was growing up, I felt unsatisfied with the world for some reason, that it's
only dragging me down.

That's when I discovered these Manga Books lying
around the Library's shelves one day. Their stories were so interesting
with such great drawings(well, some of them anyway). I became obsessed
with Manga and wanted to drift into a world like the ones in manga.

That's when kids started to bully me for it, don't get me wrong, I'm not completely
nerdy-looking or anything, it's just that, people started noticing that
I'm always in my own world, imagining, but they don't give two shits about
it anyhow and saw me as some Otaku.

By the time College started, the teasing stopped and I was
already trying for a career in Animating. I'm not good or bad, really, I
was pretty mediocre, but looking back in my years, I have been pretty
occupied with Manga and my ideal world, that I seem to have lost all my
love for the world I live in. It was pretty depressing to think about
it, I sat alone in the Cafe, everyone was talking, laughing their ass
off on some random BS and whatnot. I was just sitting there, eating my
lunch, like I do in High School. I thought of myself as an observer, to
see others talking, listening to them. I thought I was going to do that
forever, until something happened.

As if a wish granted by the Heavens, when I was walking around the dorms, I stumbled upon an old room, it seemed like a cellar, but nothing's in the storage. I saw a door at the end of the room, I walked in and was greeted by pitch-darkness. The next thing I knew, I fell god-knows how far down. When I woke up, I realize I'm in an old castle, I was completely dumbfounded and surprised, and then, that's when I saw monsters of all sorts, huge, small, ugly, cute, but one thing they have in common, they want to kill me. I had to fend myself off of
them while I ran from that castle, I was scared shitless of them, but
gradually, I became happy, happy that there's something different and
weird to do in my life.

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More to come.

I've felt the same way a lot.
Like my life was worthless and stupid, and that even if some big quest or dangerous adventure may be scary and a big responsibility, it'd give me something interesting to live for.

A little critique;
1. You change tenses a lot. Not only when you're talking about the past, but in the supposed present too.
"I realized I'm in an old castle" is a perfect example. If it were present tense, it'd be, I realize I'm in an old castle. If it were past tense you'd say, I realized I was in an old castle.

2. Why bother censoring it? Unless it's for school, the stars kind of distract from the meaning. We're all teenagers here, we don't care, LOL.

Pretty good though C:

1. Oh, I see, I'll try finding those things and changing them a bit.

2.I had copy/pasted this on another forum I'm in that does not like outward swearing a lot. C:

ADDED ENTRY


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Entry 2
Dallas Skye

I found a spear lying on the ground somewhere, so I picked it up to fight against those monsters. I never even asked why I was here in the first place, I was just so caught up in the moment when I was fighting.

Eventually, I stumbled upon a town before I got too hungry and fell down, and I saw some those townsfolk picking me up and I guess putting me in some house to lie down.

When I woke up, I was lying on a bed that had a blanket-covered roof on it. I turned and saw some women in pioneer clothes staring at me. One of them asked me where I was from, I was going to answer, but the gut-splitting pain from hunger had me doubled over back to bed. The women gave me some dry bread to eat, not very appetizing but it's food, so I ate it. When I got some strength back, I told them I was from a college, but those girls asked what a college is.

That's when I thought that I might have travelled back in time to pioneer days, so I told them that it's my home and tried to get out of bed. I didn't make it past the door and blacked out.

Once again, I found myself in the same bed and one of the women told me to just stay put for the night to get most of my strength back, like I had a choice. So I spent the night in a strange house where there's mostly women there, I didn't have much to do, so I fell back asleep.

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